so so tired

What a weekend! My half-sister and her boyfriend drove all the way from Massachusetts to visit my husband, son, and me in Illinois. 

 

They arrived on Thursday while I was still at work. My husband met them at the house and took them over to our neighborhood pool for a few hours. After I got home, we all went out to dinner at Emmett’s, one of our favorite local places. After dinner we watched 50/50 and then went to bed.

Unfortunately, I had to work on Friday, but my husband was able to show them around the area. They had sushi for lunch at Matsuri in Geneva and then walked around the downtown for a bit. That night we had a few other people over for apps, hotdogs, and steak, and then we all played Who What Where, a fun drawing game. Of course my sister and her boyfriend came in 1^st and 2^nd place – they are art majors, after all!

Saturday we woke up bright an early and headed into Chicago for the day. Luckily, my MIL and SIL babysat Evan for us; it would have been a challenge to spend a whole day downtown with a 1 ½ year old! 

We parked at the Lincoln Park Zoo. My MIL has a membership, so parking was only $9. We walked all the way to Michigan Ave. from there. We went into the Water Tower Plaza to use the restrooms and check out the Lego store. Then we walked down Michigan Ave. until we got to Millennium Park. We had lunch at Tavern at the Park.

It started raining as soon as we left the restaurant, so we jetted over to the Art Institute and spent a few hours in there. I have to say, I think the Monet exhibit was my favorite. I wasn’t as impressed by Van Gogh, for some reason. I liked all the super old, religious stuff as well. It was creepy yet fantastic.

 After the Art Institute, we spent some time in front of “The Bean.” Then we cabbed it over to the Hancock Building to enjoy some dessert and drinks on the 95^th floor. I am pretty sure the women’s bathroom on the 95^th floor of the Hancock has the best view of the city! It is absolutely stunning! (The men’s room doesn’t even have a window!)

 By that point, we were all completely wiped out. We cabbed it back to LPZ and drove home. My sister and her boyfriend went straight to bed when we got back to the house. My hubby and I stayed up for a while, watching House Hunters and chatting. We were in bed by 11:00, though.

We all slept in on Sunday, had a late breakfast, and then went to the Chicago Botanic Garden in Glencoe. We all got some great photos before having an early dinner at the café. After that we headed back home. My legs were just killing me from all the walking, so I spent the rest of the evening with my feet up. 

 My sister and her boyfriend took a quick nap and then departed around 10:00.  My husband and I watched Friends With Kids and then headed off to bed.

Needless to say, I am exhausted today. We covered a lot of ground in one weekend! Chicago is so massive, you could stay for a month and still not see everything.  Next time we definitely want to hit up the theater district and Old Town or Wicker Park with them.

All in all, everyone had a great time. I got a little misty-eyed as we were saying our goodbyes, but she promised they’d be back once baby #2 arrives. I miss them already and can’t wait for next time!

dear dad

My father was a simple man...cereal for breakfast, work before fun, meat and potatoes for supper, the evening news on TV.

He always seemed happy. He worshiped my mother. He never complained, even though he worked construction in the Florida heat day in and day out, making peanuts for money. I don't recall him ever taking a sick day. Every year he spent his Christmas bonus on me.

He couldn't sing...but that didn't stop him; he sang me to sleep and sang me awake. He let me give him a real haircut when I was 8 years old and opened a pretend barber shop in my playroom.

With my dad, what you saw was what you got. He showed me what it means to honor your word. If he said he would, he did. He never let me down.

To me, he was safety and stability. He didn't sugar coat the truth or lie to make the hard times easier (but he did make the hard times easier).

My father wasn't my friend - he was my dad. He was the cornerstone on which my childhood rested.

Now a haircut isn't just a haircut, and the simplest things in life bring me the greatest joy. Thanks, Dad.

i can't hear you!!

Sometimes the things people say make me want to hold my hands over my ears and shout, "La, la, la, la...I can't hear you!"

My sister-in-law made just such a comment the other day, and it's still bugging me. She's almost forty, hasn't had a real relationship...well, ever...and somehow thinks she knows everything about marriage and parenting.

According to her, people in relationships shouldn't fight or argue...relationships should always be easy. Parents shouldn't let their toddler cry it out at bedtime...they should just let the kid stay up until he passes out. If a kid doesn't want to eat what's for dinner, the parents should present him with a number of other options that might be more pleasing to his palate...God forbid the kid cry (a.k.a. throw a tantrum) for even five minutes.

Anyhow, I digress. The other day I was standing in front of a restaurant with my mother-in-law and sister-in-law. A man walked by us, reprimanding his daughter for something (it sounded like she had been putting her feet up in the restaurant and wouldn't put them back down even when told to do so). He was taking her to the car for a time out. My sister in law said, rather loudly, "Some people just shouldn't be parents."

I asked her what he said that was so offensive, because I hadn't heard it. I was truly baffled and thought I must have missed something. She didn't say anything specific to answer my question...she just said, "People should have to get a license or pass some kind of test to have kids. Some people just shouldn't have kids." After a few minutes (it had been no longer than 3-5 minutes), the man walked by us again with his daughter. As they were heading back into the restaurant, I heard him explaining to her that she shouldn't act like that because it sets a poor example for her little brother, etc.

As they walked by, my sister-in-law made another comment. She said, "There goes father of the year."

I just don't get it. Maybe a kid putting their feet up (I didn't catch exactly where she was putting her feet) in a restaurant is no big deal to my sister-in-law, but I don't see how she thought the father was a bad parent for being strict with his daughter about her behavior. Maybe she was refusing to listen and being really argumentative. Maybe the family just has strict rules about etiquette. Who knows? All I know is I wish more parents would give their kids time outs, actually do some parenting and address inappropriate behavior.

My sister-in-law is judgmental (she is still single and doesn't have very many friends for a reason). It's just how she is, and I know this. However, every time she makes a comment, it affects me deeply. Whenever she's around, I feel like she's judging me as a parent. I fully admit I'm far from a perfect parent (I don't always read to my son at night, I sometimes lose my temper and need to walk away from him, sometimes I just feed him fruit, yogurt, and cereal for dinner, et al.), but I do the best I can. I set limits for my son, and I give him time outs or at least try to talk to him about why something isn't acceptable. He's only nineteen months old, so my tactics don't always make an impact, leaving me scratching my head. Most of the time, I'm not sure if I'm doing something wrong, of if it's just normal toddler behavior. I am sure that my son knows I love him, he knows there are limits, and he knows I'm going to do something about it if he doesn't listen to me. That may not stop him (it usually doesn't), but at least I'm doing something.

I need advice. I just don't know how to deal with her. This isn't the first time she has made comments about other peoples' parenting. She has directed comments at me before, but only once or twice, in regards to not letting my son cry at bedtime. I just feel on edge now when I'm around her. She picks up my son from daycare two nights per week, so she's around a lot. She is hyper-sensitive, so if I say anything to her, she'll twist the whole thing around and I'll come out looking like the bad guy. I don't know how to process this, how to address it, or if I should even bother addressing it.

I wish there was a switch I could flip that would make me not care what she thinks. How do you handle unwanted criticism in your life?